Look, I love writing about how much my life sucks as much as you love reading it. Promise. But every once in awhile, something really epically awesome happens, and I can’t actually share it with you because this isn’t called “The Epically Awesome” (although maybe it should be?); it’s called “The Low Point.” So I push the good stuff aside and wait for the thunder and lightning and raging storm, and it inevitably comes in the form of a grasshopper or a late night movie screening just a few days later. Lucky me.
But seriously I had a series of really fortunate events the other day that simply cannot go unnoticed. So here it is: the one high point I’m going to bother you with. Then we’ll get back to the juicy stuff and I’ll slip into a deep depression over how lame my life really is. *sobs*
The other night I laid down for a nap around 6:30 pm. I realize this is a horrible time for a nap, power or otherwise, but I was more than willing to risk facing the consequences to get a little shut-eye. I didn’t take into account, however, the possibility of my not waking up for a fairly extended amount of time — to the tune of about 13 hours, give or take a few minutes for the occasional return to consciousness only to fall back into a REM that would rival Rip Van Winkle. Yeah. 13 hour nap, y’all.
I haven’t felt so energized in probably about 20 years, and I’m kind of gearing up to have a 13 hour nap at least once a month just because it’s so dang awesome.
And then, when I finally awoke and got myself to work, I received a really fantastic phone call informing me I’d been selected to sing the national anthem at Utah Jazz basketball game.
Yeah. You heard me. A flippin’ NBA game. Dear voice teacher, You’re the best. Seriously. The best.
Well, okay, there’s a low point: I was feeling mostly very excited at the prospect of singing the ole Star Spangled Banner for around 20,000 fans — after all, I sang it when I was about 17 years old at a high school football game and THAT’S got to be basically the same thing — until I decided to Youtube past singers. That’s when I made the horrible realization that a man, with a freakishly large video camera, is most likely going to stand about a foot away from me the entire minute and a half so I can be featured on the Jumbotron.
Things I never ever ever ever ever want: 1. To be featured on the Jumbotron.
Oh, what have I gotten myself into.